|Thursday, October 25, 2007 at 10/25/2007 01:08:00 PM
SittinG here... I really woNder? Why aM i sTill boTher bY the thIngs thaT hv alreaDy be bygones. ObviouslY my Life is gettIng beTTer. BUt Is thE impAct reaLLy so biG thaT i am so puzzLed anD boThereD by iT? I thoUght i gOt ovEr it.. But tHe feeLings I hAd now... no I'm suRe iT's NoT oVer...
Abt 4 mtHs ago... i waS disLiked bY 2 bOys in my class... haha Till noW i duN undeRstaNd whY.. AnywAy 4 mThs haD passed... BUt whY is tHe imPaCt so Big? U nOe in mY whOle liFe i HAd neVA meT ppL wiTh suCh barBariC aTTituDe... duN droP coMMent of saYing i"m ruDe or bad foR saying them in that way... Because see whAT they do to me first... EverydaY i go school i was traumatised.. So traumatised thAT i had skiPPed sCh for 1 week anD i am williNg 2 gif up sch.. Every singLe day thEy mAke fuN of me.. saying me Fat and stuff... i dun mind seriously. Ask around i'll alwaYs degRade mysElf 2 make ppl lauGH... I'll shaKe my FAts arounD dO all stUpid thiNgs juX 2 makE ppl lauGH... buT they wouldn't stop thEre... They stArt goiNg dowN 2 sayinG abOut MY BREAST MY VAGINA! hello? 4 gooDness saKe i am a giRl, nO mattER hoW strOng a girL can gET whO can beAr the thOUght of ppl critisiNg ALL YOUR PRIVATE PARTS? If u can pls tell me.. teach me how den?It's An evERydaY thIng PerhaPs iT has becOme a roUtinE foR them? Then, sLowlY i GOt oUtcasT... The giRl in My class were gReat! they weRE really supportive of me.. some guys 2 they are great... But mayBe they are afraid of voicing ouT for me fearIng thAT They miGht get ouT casT 2! I was so ouT casT thaT even oNe of mY teaCher told me... A few moRe weeks anD u gEt 2 fiNish this teRm so juZ bear wiTh it! BUT I CAN"T! IT'S A TORTURE! juz haVing thE thoUGhts of stayiNg in clASs 1 day... I ratHer quIt schOOl... U may say... she's maD 2 quiT school because of that... but seriously when u are in that situation no 1 can help u... and ur result drops and drops and u dun wanna go sch... den y still continue schooling... Lucky foR me, My coUrse maNager is wiLLing 2 heLp me chanGe class... I AM FREE!!!
4 mths later...
AltHough liFe is greAt now... buT wheneVer i thiNK of all theSe the feelinGs suCks... You noE i reallY dun understand y? If i am thAT detestabLe... whY is it that my currenT clAss anD my school matEs in CCA can accept me? Tell u guys what lame reasons they give for disliking me...
Tell me? iS beIng FAt a cRime? Pls dO enliGhten me... And u noe whY are tHey so baRbariC?
- I like 2 asK queStioNs in Class
- I aM faT yeT i dress revealinG
- I aM fAt
One of my lecturer told the guys they are 2 much... bully me till i transfered class... anD what do they say? make a guess?
It's noT our fauLt she cant take abit teasing den she left... ABIT?
COMMENTING ON MY BREAST AND VIRGINA IS ABIT? so have they fucked me b4? oh riGht i 4 got i'm fat and ugly so even if i give myself up for free no 1 wants me i guess...
What disAppoINts me is froM 1 of my prev classmate reaction she agrees that i cant take the teasiNg... haIZ... Pls tell me? am i running from realiTY? Juz becauSe i chanGed clAss? I alwaYs thoUght i'm pursuIng a beTTer life.. cos i maKe a neW girlfren and The guYs in mY new clAss treaTs me better...
ANywaY, iT's jUz soMe thOUghts...
Life is a song and I'll play for you.